Mad Artistic Skills

It's no secret that I can't draw. Even my stick figures look like the work of a 5-year-old. One time I had to draw a pig at work for a unity activity, and this happened. Another time I had to draw a cat in class, and my classmate thought it was a mosquito. Needless to say, I try to avoid drawing wherever possible.

On my mission, however, we often took cards and little notes to the people we were teaching. And, well, the card has to big enough to justify showing up unannounced at their house to give it to them, but my Chinese handwriting was even worse than my drawing skills. This presented a quandary--take big cards with a teeny bit of Chinese on them? Or make the cards myself, knowing that the recipients would snicker every time they looked at them?

I often opted for the latter. After all, if the people weren't at home that we were taking the cards to, we would just tape them to their door. Even before they saw who had signed the cards, they knew that the sister missionaries had been there!

Since Christmas is not celebrated in Taiwan, I decided that one year for Christmas we should make Christmas cards and take them to people in the ward and others we were teaching (so that we could spread Christmas cheer on Christmas day). It took several days of making cards during our 30 minute language study (because writing in Chinese always took the whole 30 minutes...for one note or card!), but by Christmas day my companion and I had the impressive stack of cards you see below.

All the ones that look like they were made by a child? I made those ones. (Especially the ones involving felt and/or foam.) The artistic looking ones? Made by my companion.

I made sure to give the ones I made to people with children. :)

The Crawl Space

I moved a lot while I was at BYU. Like, every semester or so. And I had crazy experiences almost everywhere I went. One of the places I lived was the top floor of a 3 story building, 5 apartments wide and 3 apartments tall. I lived in the middle apartment. One day my neighbor Alexia came and knocked on our door (she lived 2 apartments down, on the end). "I locked myself out of my apartment," she said. "Can I just hang out in your apartment for the next 6 or so hours until my roommate gets home?"

We let her come in, but my roommate had a better idea. "The crawl space!" she said cryptically. As we both looked at her in confusion, she explained that she had seen a maintenance guy go up into the attic to fix the heating or something. "There's a crawl space up there...I think it goes all the way across the complex!" That creeped me out more than a little, since the entrance to said crawl space just happened to be in my bedroom. Now I would have to be even more vigilant about checking for intruders when I came home at night. Good thing our neighbors were trustworthy!

I am always game for an adventure, so naturally I volunteered to go. Alexia and I donned sweatshirts and tennis shoes and put socks on our hands so we wouldn't touch the nasty itch-inducing insulation and tied bandannas over our mouths so we wouldn't have to breathe the nasty dust-filled air. Clearly concerned about our health and safety, we then balanced a chair on top of my nightstand and hoisted ourselves up into the crawl space.

Words can't describe the feelings of mystery and intrigue as we almost melted in the 100+ degree attic crawl space wearing sweatshirts and holding flashlights with our socked hands, trying not to breathe in the stale air too deeply. I basically felt like James Bond or Indiana Jones with socks on my hands. I led the way, crawling from one beam to the next, with Alexia following closely behind and Stephanie staying in our apartment in case something went wrong. A few minutes later I came to Alexia's apartment. I double and then triple checked to make sure we were at the right apartment and then knocked on the ceiling to warn Alexia's roommate in case she had returned home early (because how creepy would it be if your neighbors suddenly broke into your room through the ceiling while you were sitting there?!) and then broke through. We dropped through the hole--success--and then ran back to my apartment to report on our success, making sure to leave the door unlocked this time.

The best part of this whole adventure (besides the fact that we did it again a couple of weeks later when Alexia locked herself out of her apartment again)? My roommate, Stephanie, is a writer...and she put the story in to one of her books, Prank Wars! So basically I'm famous now.

Rooti Tooti Fresh 'N Fruity

Recently I've been on a "free things" kick. Actually, who am I kidding. I've always been in love with free things. But recently I've been deliberately seeking out free things. I feel like I'm back in college again on the starving student diet. It's a bit pathetic, but what can I say, the temp's life is one of constant begging for free things.

Anyway. I joined a bunch of birthday clubs (all the ones that give you free things on your birthday, anyway) and several of them gave me free things just for joining. The only problem is, some of them make you buy something (like Arby's--free roast beef sandwich with the purchase of a drink, which means it's not really free, and not really worth the 15 minute drive to the closest Arby's...I found this out a little too late, unfortunately). And a lot of them don't even save you that much money.

Which is why I was so excited when I saw IHOP's thanks-for-joining-our-birthday-club-so-we-can-spam-you-with-lots-of-emails offer. A completely free "Rooti Tooti Fresh 'N Fruity," which translates into 2 slices of bacon, 2 sausages, 2 eggs, and 2 pancakes. Completely free!

Naturally I was going to cash in on this deal, even though I already went to IHOP earlier this week for their free pancakes day. (Which brings the total number of trips I've made to IHOP in the last three years up to...2.) And since my coupon expired today, I decided it was breakfast for dinner and went to the IHOP down the street. As I pulled out my phone and asked if they honored the free "Rooti Tooti Fresh 'N Fruity" deal, a pained look crossed the cashier's face. "We only accept paper copies of the coupon," she explained, crushing my hopes to save a tree by not printing out the email. "But I think the BestBuy across the parking lot has printing," she suggested. So I walked across the parking lot. And surprise! BestBuy does not have printing. But Staples was just a few stores down, so I went there to check. And what luck! What joy! They did have a printing station, and printing was only 11 cents. And I could even email them the file, so I didn't have to pay for computer use.

I promptly emailed them the coupon from my phone, overjoyed that this free dinner was only going to cost me 11 cents. But unfortunately after 15 minutes of trying (the woman next to me got involved too, but did little more than accidentally archive the email after messing with my phone for several minutes), their computer still couldn't read the email I sent, so I had to use the pay-per-minute computer. It was only 30 cents a minute, so I thought, "Well, I guess 41 cents is still a pretty good deal for a meal!" and sped through the printing process. I was startled when the final bill came up to $1.06 when it was only 2 pages, and rechecking to make sure I had sent it to the right printer cost me another minute. Irritated, I printed the pages, logged off, and then asked the checker how much printing from the computers was. "It's 48 cents," he said.

"Oh, it's not 11 cents?"

"Nope."

Irritated not only by the extra charges but also by his nonchalant attitude about the price that was 4x more expensive than what he had told me, I said, "Oh. I thought it was 11 cents. I wouldn't have printed if I knew it was that much more."

"It's not that much money," he said, giving me a look that said "Dollars are the new pennies, lady."

"IT'S THE PRINCIPLE OF THE MATTER THAT COUNTS!" I wanted to shout at him, but instead I politely but firmly said, "Well, I wouldn't have printed if I had known how much it would cost" and turned and left before I started shouting. As I was leaving I looked down at the coupon I had just printed and my heart sank. Right in the middle of the coupon was printed, "! This coupon has been viewed too many times."

What? After all that money they were just going to invalidate my coupon? I should have just gone home then but I'd already spent $2 on this free meal. I was committed. So I walked back to IHOP and gave them the coupon. "Will you still honor this?" I asked the same girl who had refused my phone coupon before. "When I went over to print it I had to pull it up several times...and nowhere on the coupon does it say it can only be viewed a limited number of times..."

Well thankfully her manager honored it, so I got my free meal. But of course the offer was for dine-in only, and I didn't have any cash with me, and I would feel like a complete jerk if I left without leaving a tip. So I had to buy something so I could pay with my credit card. I spent several minutes finding the cheapest thing on the menu, and finally decided upon the chocolate milk--2.09 for regular and 2.39 for large. "Can I have the regular chocolate milk?" I asked my waitress, making sure to emphasize that I wanted the regular. I didn't want to spent more than I had to, just so I could leave a tip.

And you know what, y'all? IHOP is expensive! Just how much does it cost to make pancakes and eggs? The Rooti Tooti Fresh 'N Fruity is normally $7.99! The cheapest item on the menu is actually buttered toast--no jam on that sucker, and it still costs $1.89! And I wouldn't exactly classify IHOP as fine dining, either.

Anyway. I ate my meal (the only loner in the restaurant...it felt like everyone was staring at me eating by myself until a guy in his 20s walked in and sat at a table by himself, jammin out to some serious tunes on his ipod...which made me feel much more normal as a loner!) but when it came time to pay, I was surprised by the $2.39 bill for a large chocolate milk. "Didn't I get the regular chocolate milk?" I asked the waitress. "Oh yeah, we don't have regular. We only have large." What?! Why was this not mentioned to me when I specifically requested regular, even pointing at the "regular" price?

So yeah. Even though I tried my hardest to get a free meal, I still paid more than $6. For a "free" meal. I guess all of that trouble was worth saving $2?

Giving Up Guilt (for Lent)

For reasons that won't be enumerated here, I've had quite a long hiatus from blogging. I keep thinking about posting again, but haven't had the motivation or the inspiration.

Well friends, today I got both the motivation and the inspiration, in part by my sister's revamped blog and her goal to post every day. When I thought of what I would post every day, if I did such a thing, I suddenly remembered all of those stories that I love to tell but I've never written down anywhere. I would hate to forget how hilarious / ridiculous those stories were, but where to record them?

That's when the inspiration struck. At least for the month of March, I have a goal of posting daily stories from my life. They don't have to be from that day, month, or year; they just have to be stories from my life. (That's where the new blog title, "Stories of My Life," comes from. That and this song, slightly modified, by One Direction.) Most of the stories will probably be under the aforementioned categories of hilarious and/or ridiculous, as I'm not quite ready to bare my soul on social media and tell the stories of sorrow, anger, and frustration. You should all thank me for that. :)

So for today, since it's Ash Wednesday and I'm thinking about what to give up for my (Mormon) observation of Lent, what better start than a story of something that I gave up for something better?

This story begins on my mission. I was living in Taiwan and it was my second transfer "on island," which means I'd been in Taiwan for about two months. Strangely enough, my lifetime of type-A personality and perfectionism hit me hard-core as a missionary, and I felt more guilt than I ever had in my life. Every missed opportunity was a weighty burden on my soul. Preach My Gospel says talk to everyone, right? My first transfer I would almost have anxiety attacks when we were going outside to exercise at 6:30 in the morning because there were more than 1,000 people on the sidewalk. At 6:30 am. And HOW IN THE WORLD WAS I SUPPOSED TO TALK TO ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE? Clearly I was a terrible missionary because I wasn't doing what Preach My Gospel specifically outlined successful missionaries do. My companion that transfer had some sort of liver or kidney troubles, so she needed to use the bathroom as soon as she felt the urge to go, not wait 12 minutes until 9 pm came around and we could go back inside. This happened quite a few times at night, and we would go inside a few minutes early. Those 12 minutes sitting inside my apartment waiting for my companion to come out so we could do our nightly planning sessions felt like an eternity of disobedience. After all, obedient missionaries don't go inside until 9, and not a minute before! What else was I doing wrong? Did I smile enough as I was riding my bike through the rain and wind? After all, what if someone saw an unhappy missionary?! Did I testify enough in lessons? Did I study Chinese hard enough each day?

I won't even begin to list all of the things that I felt guilty about those first few transfers of my mission. But it was a heavy, heavy burden to bear each day. (You might think this sounds ridiculous now, but it was a big deal for me back then, as it is, I'm sure, for many missionaries.) 

In zone conference that transfer, the mission president told us the story of the Anti-Nephi-Lehis and how they buried their swords. He passed out papers with clip-art swords printed on them, and invited us all to pray about something that we could give up that was keeping us from fully serving God.

After several days of thinking about it, I couldn't think of anything that I could give up that would seem like a sacrifice. My companion decided to give up chocolate, or something like that, but the chocolate in Taiwan tasted like wax anyway so I didn't feel like that would be much of a sacrifice for me. And then one day, as I was riding my bike around the city on the way to the church, it hit me. 

Guilt. Guilt. I should bury my guilt deep in the earth.

"What a cop-out," was my immediate response. Other missionaries were giving up things that were important or really mattered in their lives, and I was giving up guilt? But the more I thought and prayed about it, the more I realized that yes, guilt was exactly what was holding me back. Because in the end, it really didn't matter if I didn't talk to every single person on the sidewalk every single second I was outside. Not only was that impossible, but it really wasn't up to me to do God's work. He could do it just fine by Himself, and was just letting me help. As a missionary, I was kind of like a 3-year-old helping mom make cookies. Have you ever had a child help you make cookies? Generally, all they do is make a mess. We all know that you could make the cookies by yourself just fine, but you want them to learn, and you want them to spend time with you. 

That's kind of how missionary work is. Like little inexperienced and under-skilled children, we go around making a mess as we try to preach the gospel. But you know what I learned when I decided to bury my guilt deep in the ground and just try to do God's work? When we freely admit our inadequacies but are not overwhelmed by them, God can do the most good through us. 

So wondering what to give up for Lent? I'd suggest letting go of perfectionist guilt for a couple of days. Try it out. See what happens.

2013 Facebook Year in Review

I did a "Facebook Year in Review" last year and, even though it took a ton of time, I loved it! I'm much better about updating Facebook than I am my blog (what can I say, the satisfaction of all those "likes" for writing just one or two sentences is pretty great), but it's great to have the whole year in one blog post. 

And maybe one of these days I'll update my blog with the off-Facebook version of my year!

January

8
Well, I didn't get my Cafe Rio fix while I was in Utah, but I did get to sing "Little Bunny Foo Foo" on repeat with these small children. It's been real, Utah. Until next time...

9
The best part about vacationing in Utah's frigidly cold 10-degrees-every-day Christmas break weather? Coming back to Columbus' 48 degree weather feels like I've returned to a tropical paradise.

14
One of my little piano students always sings at the top of her lungs when she uses the bathroom at my house (it's upstairs and the piano is downstairs). I don't have the heart to tell her that we can still hear her...but it makes me laugh every time. Little kids are so adorable.

16
When people park like this it always make me wonder, "how did they expect me to get into my car?"

24
After craving cold cereal all day, I was startled when I got home and realized that I didn't have any milk. Thankfully I'm not deterred by such paltry details and ate my chocolate rice crispies with water instead. At least it tasted better than the time I had blueberry muffin top cereal with pink lemonade koolaid...a combination I highly recommend avoiding.

26
One of my piano students turned 8 last week and got baptized today...congratulations Hannah!!

February

5
Nothing like getting a glass of ice water dumped in your lap on a freezing cold morning.

10
Just had hot pot with some great friends from Taiwan, Singapore, and Hong Kong. Even in Ohio, Chinese New Year is awesome.

15
Found this on my door when I left my house yesterday morning. I later found out that ALL of the girls in my ward (probably 50+) also got one on their door...which means that someone stayed up all night delivering flowers (I'm guessing at least 5 hours of driving). Thanks to the anonymous person(s) who spent so much time and effort doing this!

16

Dim Sum with my Asian friends. Fried tofu, cow stomach...mmm!

21
Some nights a jr bacon cheeseburger is the best way to end the day. (It was delicious.

22
What the freezing rain?!

24
Favorite quote from my single's ward today: "Missionary work is kind of like dating. You don't tell someone you love them on the first date. ...or maybe you do, and that's why you're all still in this ward."

March

2
Note to self: next time take the brownies out BEFORE you turn the oven up to 500 to preheat it for the pizza.

3
Today we had a 6-year-old visitor in my singles ward, so I graciously offered to teach him Primary. We were talking about baptism, and I asked him, "Parker, have you been baptized?" "No," he answered, "but I've been good-tized."

Definitely still laughing about that one!

4
Best part of my morning was definitely teaching "Old MacDonald" to a class full of adult refugees. It made me wonder what the people walking by the classroom thought as I mooed, hee-hawed, baaed, and neighed for my class. Monday mornings are always hard for my class because they've been speaking their own languages all weekend (class is in English), but I knew that "Old MacDonald" was a success because they were falling off their chairs laughing at my animal sounds instead of falling asleep in the back!

5
I think the only way to describe this weather is "pouring snow." I felt almost reckless, speeding past the other cars at 15 mph on the freeway. I could easily spot the drivers who'd never driven in snow before and got caught in the freak snowstorm--their flashers were on and they were going no more than 4 mph on the freeway. It was a fun drive home tonight!

6
Breakfast of champions this morning.

7
Spring break and it's time for a road trip. DC, here I come!

9
Because what's a visit to Philly without some cheesesteak? — with Noelle Teh

13
Nothing like a Cafe Rio Wednesday. Definitely worth a 7 hour drive...are we going to get one of these in Ohio anytime soon?

17
Just saw an announcement in my ward bulletin for a "steak relief society fireside." Now that's my kind of fireside!

23
Today when I was checking out at Walmart I told the checker to just put everything in one bag. It's what I do to save the environment, one bag at a time. Unfortunately I didn't realize until I was walking away that she had double bagged it...

31
Thinking about spending Easter last year in Jerusalem with some of my favorite people. Wishing them and everyone else a happy Easter!

April

1
Today I was trying to get a little boy I babysit to show his mom a song we learned, but he didn't want to perform in front of her. "It's like being on a first date with your mom coming along," she said, trying to explain his behavior. Umm...not exactly the comparison I was going for...

5
Let's be honest. Some days I feel like this. But then every time I look at this picture, I just laugh and it makes everything better. So I'm posting this for all of you who are having one of "those" days.

8
Thanks everyone for the birthday wishes! 謝謝大家的生日祝福！I'd especially like to thank the weather...the sun came out and it was 70 degrees! Hello spring! And I'd also like to thank the mouse in my apartment that left me such a nice little present under the kitchen sink. Now to call pest control...

11
Nothing like a good downpour to give me the motivation to work on my thesis...after I take a break to dance in the rain...

12
Sure wish pest control had set mouse traps instead of bait...anybody want to come over and help me find a dead and decaying mouse in my house? He ate all the poison and...died somewhere.

15
Getting locked in the public bathroom when the lock broke was probably the best way to start the morning today.

16
Today one of my good friends took me out to lunch. (It was almost like a joke: an Egyptian and an American walk into an Ethiopian/Asian restaurant...). We were there for so long chatting after the meal was over, the waitress brought us lychee and mango juice on the house! I'm definitely going back! If anyone's looking for a great restaurant in Columbus, I highly recommend the Blue Nile on High St.

17
Today my friend told me, "you bring out the ghetto in me." I'll take that as a compliment!

19
Dear Utah friends, get ready to PARTY! I just bought a plane ticket and I'll be out for a couple of days in May. SOO excited to see my nieces and nephews!!

22
Well, at least they removed the nest! Now I just have to wait for the poisoned-but-not-dead mice to get stuck in the glue traps...who knew that getting rid of mice would be such a process?

25
Since my classes are over now and the only thing that stands between me and my MA is my thesis, I thought I'd post one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite classes at OSU. Picture this: 5 alpha-females and one very nice male professor discussing Foucault. And what came of that 3.5 hour class? This quote: "It's not Johnny Depp--it's the ostracized pirate position he occupies." And this picture (not drawn by me). Yes, friends, this is doodling, grad-student style.

26
Whenever someone asks me, "How come you aren't married yet?!" I always want to make up a ridiculous answer, like "since my parents were both disabled in a car crash I've been so busy working to support my 13 siblings that I haven't had time to look for a husband" or "after my first three fiancés were killed in separate accidents and the fourth called off the wedding, I decided to take a break for a while." But I'm not very creative. Any suggestions of other ridiculous answers to this question?

27
I walked in to the laundry room at my apt complex to get my clothes and saw a bunch of junior high kids sitting in the laundry room just chilling (I guess it's the cool place to hang out these days). As I walked past, one of the girls told me, "I like your hair." And now I basically feel like the epitome of cool.

29
Another gem from my rhetoric class: It's a well-known fact that I can't make it through a 3.5 hour class (or even a 1 hour class) without snacks. I felt like a little kid one day as I pulled out my plastic baggie full of animal crackers and started munching on them. (To help you imagine it, since there were only 5 students in the class, we all sat around a big table.) Temporarily forgetting that I was sitting in the middle of class, I started pretending to make my animal crackers dance on my laptop. Looking up to see my classmates amused expressions was definitely a highlight of the day (and watching me pretend to make my animal crackers dance on my laptop was probably the most random part of their day!).

Don't worry, the next week I redeemed myself by bringing enough animal crackers to share with everyone in the class.

29
Ha! I just beat my 1-hour-per-page paper-writing-record by two hours. And I'm turning it in 3 full hours before it's due. Take that, grad school!!

May

1
I saw this book sitting in the library at the institute building (which doubles as a chapel for two singles wards). I had a plethora of snarky comments run through my head and then realized, this book needs no caption. It's its own snark.

4
I had a recital for my voice/piano students today...and at the end, they gave me flowers!! Now if only I had a real vase to put them in instead of just a water pitcher...

4
Whenever people ask me to say something on demand in a foreign language just for kicks, I want to say, "What do you think I am, Google Translate?"

6
So grateful to belong to a church where the members truly care for each other! Yesterday as I was driving to church my tire blew out (the ball bearing broke) on the freeway. Less than 5 minutes after I skidded over to the side with black smoke billowing from my tire, the Relief Society president texted me to see if I was ok--apparently someone from my congregation was passing me at the exact moment my tire blew out and called the RS president (she didn't have my number) to see if I was ok. So not only was I safe and didn't cause a major accident, but I also had people worrying about and praying for me in the very instant it happened!!

9
Since my stress level has gone through the roof lately, I have decided two things: first, I am clearly not consuming enough chocolate; second: I'm making a new rule that no one can ask me about my future job, husband, or living situation unless they are willing to offer an answer to the stated question. Categories can be interchangeable. For example, if you want to ask me about my dating situation, it is perfectly acceptable to offer me a job or suggest a place to live. But if you don't have a solution to offer, just don't ask.

16
Today when I went to pick my nephew up from preschool, he introduced me to his teacher this way: "This is my very very most favorite friend in the entire world!" Made the entire trip to Utah worth it.

17
Highlights from today: one of my nephews loves his helmet--so much that he wanted to wear it even when he was playing with his trucks in the sandbox. Also, I asked my niece and nephew to make a face "like an angry fish" because they wouldn't smile for the pictures. I think they did a pretty good job! And I rediscovered the joy of potato/roly poly bugs. I'll admit it--my nieces and nephews are adorable!

19
So delighted for my dear friends who got married yesterday. Congratulations Kyle and Amy!

20
You know it's a great family picture photo shoot when little children are flying in the air by the end...

21

This is how I feel about my thesis right now. "I hate it SO much. Flames. Flames on the side of my face!"

23
Days like today remind me of the time on my mission when I introduced myself as "Sister White" and the woman, hearing the tones wrong (or I said them wrong, perhaps!) said, "Sister Failure?!"

Sigh. Time to find some chocolate!

24
I've lived in my apartment for 9 months. That's longer than anywhere I've lived in the last 8 years. I think it's time to move again. One more week and it's peace out, Columbus. It's been real.

25
Today someone told me that I remind them of Chloe from 24. Since I've never seen the show, I looked her up on Wikipedia and found this gem of a sentence: "[Chloe] works very well under pressure, yet it is obvious when she is under pressure, and she has always demonstrated a degree of social awkwardness."

Nice.

27
One of the worst things about moving so often is saying goodbye so often--and this weekend was full of them! First my Friday night coworkers at the Columbus temple, then my Bible study group at our service project on Saturday, and then my lovely elderly friends at the retirement center where several of us from my ward sing twice a month...I'm ready to be done with goodbyes! I sure am going to miss my dear friends here in Ohio!

28

I do most of my studying at the institute building (which is also where I go to church), and since I'm desperately trying to finish my thesis before I move, I have basically taken up residence in the building. The missionaries (who are there a lot) often comment in how much I study...and then today they brought me some cookies because they figured I needed a little cheering up after all that research!! So thoughtful!

June

5
You know how moms with small children are often told, "Just enjoy it while you can--you'll miss this period of life when they're grown"? Well. I've NEVER heard anyone say that about grad school. Just sayin.

10
Finally turned in the thesis...and with 2 minutes to spare! (Just call me Last Minute Lucy!) That was the longest 65 pages of my life. Just one week until the thesis defense, and then maybe I can get my life back...

13
And my good news for the day: my apartment contract in Columbus sold! Which means that I'm no longer paying for rent in two cities. What a relief.

17
Just passed my thesis defense! Feel free to call me Master Breanne.

22
Today I was sitting outside the library talking on the phone when someone sat down a little upwind from me and lit up a cigarette. The wafts of smoke swirling around me got to be too much, so I got up and moved. And then, to my complete and utter surprise, the man who was smoking noticed and apologized! Although it was a public place and he had every right to smoke as I had to not smoke, it really touched me that he would apologize and then move to another, less obtrusive place to finish his smoke break. So thank you, man sitting outside the library. I appreciated the gesture.

23
Tonight's missionary leadership broadcast was made even more exciting by my roommate's announcement that she has decided to get baptized. Congratulations Kate!!

29
Moving today for the third time in 29 days. All I need is a camel and then I think I can officially qualify as a nomad.

29
For those of you who have been worried that I would die of heat stroke in my car, I fixed my air conditioning today! And I did it all by myself! (Actually, with a few phone calls to my dad and brother for assistance. But still.) My a/c was blowing cold air today for the first time in months--what a relief!

July

11
Now this would be a cool job! Rappelling window washer.

12
Today as I was walking to the metro in the rain, some nice lady pulled over and asked me if I needed a ride. I was almost there so I said no, but I appreciated the gesture--totally made my day! (Also, it was the first time in two years that someone who was not a total creeper asked me if I needed a ride. I think this is a good sign.)

13
Had a great time at an interfaith service project this morning! 5 churches teamed up with Stop Hunger Now to prepare 12,000 food packets to be sent to Haiti.

17
I went to the store today and as I was checking out, the checker (male and probably 50+) told me, "I really like your hair! Especially when you were turned around...it looked really great." I wasn't sure whether I should be flattered, or creeped out, or offended that he thought my hair looked better when he didn't have to see my face, too!

18
The DMV is my favorite place in the entire world. Good thing, too, since I've had to make several visits in the past few months...and I'm gonna have to make several more in the next few weeks. Including a visit to a special DMV 4 hours (round trip) away! Special DMV visit are where it's at, y'all.

19
Open mic at the Iftar tonight at the American Islamic Heritage Museum in Anacostia. Special thanks to the Green Crescent community for hosting! The food was delicious...and having an open mic at an Iftar was definitely a first for me!

20
This was a good reminder for me today. "Trust God and believe in good things to come."

30
My little nephew (he's 3) has been praying every day for the past several weeks that I would be able to find a job. When I called my sister today to tell her the exciting news that I got a job, she told my nephew and he asked, "Why did Aunt Breanne get a job?" Then he got a big smile on his face and said, "Was it because I prayed for her every day to get a job?" I'm sure that played a huge part in it! (That and my 5 other nieces and nephews who were also praying for me to find a job!)

August

1
I have an amazing talent for taking creepy ID pictures that make me look like an ex-convict. Just got my new license in the mail...looks like the Virginia DMV helped make it happen again!

4
Just got back from a great weekend visiting my surrogate nieces and nephews in New York. This family was in my branch in Jerusalem and they practically saved my life (and my sanity!) while I was living over there with lots of Saturday dinners, fun times at the park, and way too many nights staying up until 2 or 3 am chatting. This weekend was a great chance to catch up and included the best of the best in New York: a visit to Chinatown and its delicious selection of food, fun times at the park, and of course staying up until the wee hours of the morning chatting. Oh, and lots of time giving piggy back rides...and an incredible view from my window! What's not to love with a view like that!

7
I went to get some fruit snacks today at a little store in the building where I worked but I didn't have cash and the amount wasn't enough to use card. I was about to just leave it and go back to work fruit snack-less, but then the two men behind me in line both put some money on the counter and paid for it!! They were buying lottery tickets at the time...so I totally told them that I hope they win

10
Lovely day kayaking at the aquatic gardens.

14
Look what came in the mail today! Guess it's official...

20
I just moved this weekend. This marks the 12th move in the past 2 years! Guys, I don't think even people running from parole violations move this frequently. Seriously.

25
Happy 135th birthday, Primary! My time spent in the Primary presidency was the best calling I've ever had--never a dull moment!

29
Just signed up for a Russian class this fall. Look out guys, I'm basically about to take over the world.

September

1
Had a weekend filled with adventures hiking in the Shenandoah mountains: rattlesnakes, swimming in waterfalls, exploring caves, a cheap Italian restaurant with food as big as your head--this weekend had it all! Special thanks to Savanna Nilsen's generous aunt and uncle, who provided lodging, delicious food, and great company, all at no charge.

2
I'm happy to announce that I'm the proud owner of a kitchen table! It's a step up from my old table and chair. And the best part--it was free!

3
This morning I woke up and thought, "This is the first back-to-school day in 23 years that I haven't had to go to school...and I never have to go to school again bwahaha!" Just kidding. I didn't think that. I didn't even know it was the first day of school. Because I NEVER HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL AGAIN!! I love being done with grad school.

5
I'm thrilled to announce that nephew #5 arrived safely today! Now I just need to plan a trip down to Texas to see the little guy...

9
My newest nephew. I think I'm in love.

17
Funniest part of the day: listening to my Iraqi coworkers try to imitate the google translate read-aloud of English phrases translated into Chinese. That's right, google translate Chinese with an Arabic accent.

19
Yesterday I was standing in line at a Chinese supermarket and the woman in front of me turned around and said in Chinese, "You only have a few things...why don't you get in front of me?" Since she didn't even try English, this means one of two things...either she doesn't speak any English or I CAN TOTALLY PASS AS CHINESE. I'm going to pretend it was the latter.

23
Makin' jam.

29
So I sent my mom a text this morning, not realizing that my dad (who is the bishop of their ward) was using my mom's phone, hooked up to a big screen, to show a video clip to the combined Elder's Quorum and Relief Society.

AWKWARD. Good thing the text wasn't anything personal, because now the whole ward knows that I finished repainting my apartment.

October

2
So today, mere SECONDS after my coworker told me she was never going to believe anything I say ever again, she BELIEVED me when I said my middle name was Hildegard. HILDEGARD.

I win.

4
Just bought pumpkin bagels and sweet potato cranberry salsa. Hello, Fall.

5
Went on an early morning rock climbing trip before Conference started. Lucky for me, it was so early that the mist was still rising off the river. Happy General Conference weekend!

5
Elder Holland rocks my world. I'm so grateful to hear him address mental illness in a worldwide General Conference--especially to hear him say that we shouldn't think that depressed people just need to have a positive attitude and they will get over it. Hopefully this will help to clear up a lot of misconceptions in Mormon culture.

9
I'm happy to announce that I am now the proud owner of not one, but two toaster ovens! (My ghetto kitchen doesn't have an oven, so this is kind of a big deal.) And the best part? They were free.

11
So it's been raining for three days straight. And my basement apartment has started flooding. I called my landlord to tell her the news, and she said that unfortunately nothing can be done tonight because the roads are flooding and her maintenance guy probably can't get through. And it's still raining.

Anybody have an ark I can borrow?

20
Today the 2nd counsellor in the bishopric in my ward told me that I reminded him of "that girl who was in all those church movies in the early 80's. She had a big smile...and was just in all those 80's movies."

When I realized that he was talking about THIS movie, I didn't know if I should feel complimented or insulted. Clearly I need a hair and clothing upgrade, although I wouldn't mind having those awesome reading glasses!

http://www.lds.org/media-library/video/2012-08-1180-i-will-prepare-the-way?category=book-of-mormon%2Fintroduction-2-nephi

21
Whenever someone tells me, "what a great picture! You must have a really nice camera," it makes me want to say things like, "What a beautiful painting! You must have a really nice paintbrush," or "this dinner that you made is delicious! You must have some really nice pots and pans," or even "what nice handwriting! You must have a really nice pen."

23
My younger sister just called to ask for help with her high school homework (subordinate clauses). I knew my English degree would come in handy one day!

26
Road trippin on one of the most beautiful drives in America...

26
Nothing says State Fair like pig racing, BBQ, and deep fried EVERYTHING.

28
I highly recommend NOT pouring boiling hot chicken stock all over your hand. Just in case anyone wanted to try it.

November

6
Had a dream about going to a live Bob Marley concert in Hawaii last night. I have to admit, I woke up much more relaxed and happy than the night before last, when I had a dream about saving men and children from assassins...

7
I'm now the happy recipient of a free microwave!! And it's a huge improvement over my last microwave, circa 1985. This one even has buttons instead of a knob...and a clock! If any of you haven't heard of freecycle, let me enlighten you. It's a great online forum where you can give away things you don't want or get awesome free stuff. Although I might be taking this to the extreme, these are the things I have gotten on freecycle in the past two months:
Kitchen table and 6 chairs
2 toaster ovens
Microwave
Lamp
Swiffer
Bed frame
Amazing, eh?

11
Just saw a spider cricket up close for the first time. It was sitting outside my front door, just waiting to pounce. And now I know what nightmares are made of.

11
Beautiful day at Great Falls today. Kaitlyn and Losaunne, is this enough motivation to come out and visit?

12
Just walked in to 7-11 with a jacket on and walked out with it off (the store was hot). And this conversation happened:

Homeless man standing outside the store: "Did you change?"

Me: "No, I just took my jacket off."

Homeless man: "You look COMPLETELY different! Nice hair!"

Perhaps my hair didn't look quite as nice with my jacket on?

12
Just found a plane ticket from DC to Houston for $160 round trip...which means that I get an early Thanksgiving party and finally get to meet my newest nephew (and visit his two adorable older brothers)!

14
Ah, Fall, how I love thee.

20
The TA for my Russian class, who is around 60, brought in scarves and hats for the entire class today. Her mother made them for us!

21
So excited to see these cute faces!! Don't they look like they could be mine?

22
Nothing like meeting up with an old friend for a brunch of green eggs and freshly squeezed orange juice!

25
Haven't even taken off yet and I'm already missing my nephews! Who is going to put dinosaurs and trucks on my bed for me to find when I wake up now?

27
Woke up this morning to a lovely pre-Thanksgiving lake on my kitchen floor. Several days of rain was just too much for the newly-repaired sump pump to handle, I guess. This apartment flooding has really got to stop!

28
This Thanksgiving I'm especially thankful for dear friends who have become like family over the past several years as I have spent the holidays far from my own family. Today I was lucky enough to see Elder and Sister Hughes, who are serving a mission in Columbus and who became my dear friends while I was grad-schooling it. Thankfully they have a daughter who lives near DC--and didn't mind that I pulled them away from food prep for a few hours this morning so we could chat! Happy Thanksgiving to my friends and family all over the world!

December

5
My landlord replaced the toilet seat in my apartment. But apparently they don't make toilet seats in retro pink anymore...

7
Even though I was disappointed that I didn't see the Campbell clan represented (my mom's a Campbell) at the Scottish parade in Alexandria today, Darth Vader and an ewok made an appearance, as did colonial Santa, Santa on a motorcycle, lots and lots of dogs, and some pretty awesome bagpipe bands!

7
Well I may not have a Christmas tree this year, but no one can say I didn't decorate for Christmas! Nativity figures courtesy of Bethlehem and Jerusalem.

8
First snow of the season! Apparently this qualifies as "severe weather," because we got an announcement about 30 min before church got out that "anyone who is worried about driving home can leave now"...and church was CANCELLED for the congregation that meets right after us! Be careful out there, friends. There's at least half an inch of snow out there...

10
The schools have declared another snow day today. Even the missionaries have to take a snow day! I can see why people are concerned...the snow has covered more than half the lawn and it's only 10 am!!! (In all seriousness, though, I am grateful that snow days keep the crazies off the road so they don't cause accidents in half an inch of snow!)

12
Just went to an AMAZING concert by the United States Air Force band at T.C. Williams high school. Yep, THE T.C. Williams high school.

13
Just five days until I get to see this newborn child! I know I just said this last month, but I'm so excited to see my newest nephew! (Even newer than the newest nephew I saw in November!)

14
My Christmas present just arrived! I don't think I've ever been so excited about a mattress. Goodbye thin foam pad--you were one of the least comfortable beds I've ever had. Except that mattress I used when I was subleasing an apartment in Jerusalem that had a board running across it and poked my back no matter how I positioned myself. And that bed I had in my apartment in Beit Sahour that felt like I was sleeping on a futon. And that mattress that I bought for $79 and had lying on the floor in my apartment in Columbus...Anyway, here's to a good night's rest!!!

14
Sadly, the baklava did not survive being forgotten in the oven for 2 hours. Let me just tell you, burnt philo dough is not delicious. Not at all.

16
Had a great time at the DC temple Christmas lights last night! Lots of lights, themed Christmas trees (including a peacock Christmas tree!!), and Jenny Oaks Baker in concert! Guys, the concert was amazing, and the best news is it's playing again tonight at 6 and 7 pm!! It's free and amazing so go if you can.

17
Saw this guy at the zoo lights last night. Apparently sleeping with your tongue hanging out is the cool thing to do.

17
The first stop after stepping off the plane in Utah this afternoon was my brother's orchestra concert. As I worked my way to my seat, a random woman stopped me and said, "What's your last name?" When I told her, she said, "Your older sister was my daughter's piano teacher!" Turns out it was ME, not my older sister, that taught her daughters piano. (Guess I still look pretty young!) But guys. I AM THE WORST PIANO TEACHER EVER. Because I could not for the life of me remember her daughters. I wanted to ask her if her daughters were the ones that dropped out after 4 months of taking lessons, but I thought that might be rude. So I just pretended like I knew who she was as she told me about her daughters--one in college on a full-ride academic scholarship and the other one who will "probably major in music--she's really good. And a lot of that's thanks to you!" Oh man, it was so awkward. I still can't remember those girls. But I'm taking some consolation in the fact that she thought my "older" sister was their teacher...

20
Love these sweet faces!

21
Nephews don't get much cuter than this!!

22
My niece and nephew, ready for church. Adorable!

(I know I post a lot of pictures of my nieces and nephews. But if you had nieces and nephews this cute, you'd probably post a lot too. And since I only see them once or twice a year, I've got to make up for lost time!!)

25
Merry Christmas to all of my friends all over the world!
聖誕節快樂！
!חג המולד שמח
!عيد الميلاد سعيد
And Merry Christmas in every other language that my facebook friends speak.

(We get pajamas every year for Christmas but haven't gotten a picture of all of us in pajamas for years. This year, luckily for all of you, my mom made matching pajama pants for all of us and we took the picture at night, when we all looked normal, instead of in the morning when we all look awful. That's the only reason my siblings and parents were willing to give me permission to post this picture on facebook. We now join the ranks of awesome/nerdy matching pajama families on facebook!)

27
Nothing like a frozen yogurt run when it's 25 degrees outside! Surprisingly, we were the only ones in the store... — with Losaunne White

27
Lovely day for snowshoeing! Although I realized that I only like snowshoeing downhill... — with Losaunne White

30
Sisters lunch! Don't mind my Barbie hand or my creeper sister trying to hide her face...

31
Well, my plan for winning "sister of the year" by going to the airport at 4 am, 4 hours before my flight, to help my sister and her 3 little boys get checked in and go through security was FOILED when the Southwest counter opened more than an hour later than usual because of the holiday schedule. 10 minutes earlier is all that it would have taken to make a difference, Southwest. Sigh. Maybe I'll at least get a runner-up position.

31
As I was waiting to pick up my luggage at the airport today I took my coat off and stuffed it in to one of my bags. What can I say, it was hot in the airport. But then I walked over to the information counter and asked where the bus stop was. In the middle of answering the question, the elderly man stopped, looked at me in my short sleeves and sandals, and said, "Do you have a coat?!" I didn't tell him that I'd just come from 25 degree weather in Utah! Who needs a coat when it's 40 degrees outside?